However, these two types of people may from the outside.
Someone using alcohol to avoid their problems 9 out of 10 times will, superficially, seem to drink a similar amount as someone using alcohol to avoid their problems 10 out of 10 times .
This one was hard to spot when I first encountered it, because where I went to college, I was around a lot of heavy but highly functional video game players.
I knew people who played video games all the time, but no one who ever blew off their classwork to play video games (or at least, didn’t blow class off enough to fail.)This wasn’t true with an ex girlfriend of mine.
Let’s say, 9 nights out of 10 you look at your closet and drink instead of cleaning it, but on the 10th night, you clean it.
And, eventually if you drink regularly enough, you will get the *massive* problem of facing withdrawal symptoms when you stop drinking which will be like, 100x as bad as the previous problems you were trying to avoid, so you will be .
I was dating another programmer in SF who went out drinking with people in the SF startup scene like, every other night.
His drinking was not especially greater than anyone else’s in his social group, and indeed, as other people I know who I don’t think have drinking problems.
I also began to really hate physical intimacy with him, because I felt like I was being used.
I didn’t feel like he cared about me, or my feelings at all, but just wanted access to my body so he didn’t have to feel bad.