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(Remember the other suggestion I made up thread – Learn when to walk away.) The more focus you put on what you are lacking, the more power you give to that idea and the more prevalent it becomes.It’s about thinking “as if.” In January, I joined Dating Dummy’s Blog Wide Workout group.I made a slide show of my affirmations, using pictures of everything from the type of body I want to have to piles of money to a clip of someone reading their credit rating to the new apartment I want to have. The money flows in and, like with most businesses, flows right back out.But it’s there and the amount deposited into my business account gets larger each month. Tell yourself that it will happen and it will happen.You have to de-program yourself from thinking negatively.

I’d be inclined to publish highlights but that wouldn’t do this piece its proper justice.

What else is disheartening is for every one good date you might have, you end up having 3-5 awful ones.

For 1 person that meets your expectations there are 3-5 that don’t. Definitely take advantage of the stand-bys but add some new ones, too. Singles/social networking events are great but, like online dating, you shouldn’t rely on them to meet new people. Guys in bars are looking for the 25-32 year old gal.

Walk with your head up, make eye contact, smile…it at the deli, on the subway, at church…where ever. But don’t go to a bar with the specific intent of meeting a man. Ladies – Stop going out in groups of 3 or more single friends. Ignoring issues that are getting in the way of being happy and secure? We grow resentful of those people who do have an easier time meeting someone and that resentment morphs in to bitterness and negativity. A fear that we will never meet anyone, that we will end up alone.

You have to be open to meeting someone at all times, not just in situations designed to encourage socializing. Men aren’t crazy about approaching a group of women. If you and a friend are both burnt on the dating scene, then hang out with someone who is in a relationship or who is married. A fear that we will be hurt or left or abandoned or that we won’t be in control of the situation. I didn’t want to feel that anxiety over whether they’d call or what their lack of response meant. Face the realities head on and become as self-aware as possible.

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