But they don’t bring their partners home to interact with their parents.
“They meet up during school [because] it’s a lot easier,” Shoukfeh said. It would be pretty hard if it was someone outside of school.” The boys fear judgment by their peers so they don’t share details about how physical the relationships get.
“It’s not that bad if they don’t let it get too far,” Shoukfeh said in a phone interview from his home in West Bloomfield.
Shoukfeh said his friends communicate with their girlfriends outside of school by sending text messages and talking on the phone.
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By dating, he said, these teens can blend in with their peers.
But that is not how Sara, Shoukfeh’s classmate, sees it. it’s very natural.” The sneaking around and lying required to maintain a secret relationship was never appealing to Mehreen Zahid when she was in high school in Copiague so she refrained from dating.
“People I thought were close to me made up things and it got around. I realized that not everybody can be nice and I had to accept what was happening.” Iqbal considers herself “more aware” in her current relationship, which her parents know about. High school junior, Adnan Shoukfeh, 16, of the International Academy in Oakland County, Mich., said some of his male friends are in casual romantic relationships.
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She asked that her last name not be used to protect the identities of her family friends. Now, a college freshman at Hofstra University, she occasionally has feelings for her male friends but represses them because she doesn’t feel like she has the tools to handle a relationship.
The 17-year-old says her Muslim friends who date are just being teens. She is also wary about male-female relationships because she’s seen too many of her friends’ parents force a break-up.